i can has break? Blogosphere:

Please hold still for 2-3 days. Rest of life, also?

Moreover, whatever "holiday" stuff that I'm supposing to be doing, with the buying and the hosting? Yeah, fuck off, too, that.

This year is shaping up to be a repeat of last, with the Chico and the Man marathon and the Christmas nachos. And you know, I think it's more about having traditions and perpetuating them than it is about, like, what those traditions are, as long as they're reasonably wholesome (i.e., Norman Lear sitcoms) or whatever. Raise your hand if you have actually decked a hall with boughs of holly or roasted chestnuts over an open fire to the same extent to which people sing about doing so. If you'd rather have hot dogs and YouTube, I'm basically okay with that. Be with your people, and don't drive yourselves (or them) crazy with meeting some kind of bullshit Yuletide ideal.

thankful, spiderman

The best part of Spider-Man 2 is the train scene, and the best part of the train scene is the part with no effects: when Peter Parker is unmasked and carried, unconscious, across the crowd of people. I couldn't find a screengrab of that part.

It makes me plotz.

I don't mean to be grandiose, but I am thankful for social media the way Peter Parker is thankful for that crowd of people. At its best it allows us to ask for and receive help from our peers in the struggle. At its best it is democratic, giving each individual an equal chance to contribute to and take from its resources. We all need to carry each other because we are all on that subway together.

Edited to add: Is it just me, or does that blurry seated passenger in the middle of the field kind of look like Ban Ki-Moon?

go, Ban Ki-Moon!

"We're all fucked," says U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon. (Not an exact quote.) When he's not getting shot at with missiles in Iraq, warning Lebanon about "the brink of the abyss," or trying to bring stable democracy to Sierra Leone, Ban Ki-Moon has got to get everybody else working together on climate change, particularly the U.S. and China.

I'm worried about Ban Ki-Moon.

Is he getting depressed? Should we do meals for him?

we know dick If you live in Austin please come see The Dick Monologues if you haven't already, or even if you have. I am pleased as hell to be part of this show every month. So far the material has remained mostly steady (we have new monologues on December 16) but each performance is so different, and when you tell stories in a tiny theater with an audience practically in your lap (or another performer in your lap, also okay) you feel like you get to know them a little.

You tell them about a time when you were disappointed in love or confused by a penis and they listen and interact and imagine you there, and then you get to cross a bridge to where you are now, how you came to be standing there with the story you tell. It's not just catharsis. (Although catharsis is underrated.) It's a group acknowledgment that everyone makes foolish decisions, hopes too much, and hangs on too long because human beings are creatures of love. There are stories about frustrated longing, and there are stories of giant nude-beach Euro schlong. It's a pretty good evening.

Thanks, George I met George when I was in the hospital a year ago. George was a crusty but lovable septuagenarian and bipolar as all hell.

One day when we were graduating a person from group, she made mention of her new regimen of Depakote.

George snorted. "You can thank me for that, you know."

We all turned.

Apparently George participated in the original trials of Depakote for bipolar while in the military as a young man. Apparently George was in the control group.

"They had to put me in a rubber room."

Seriously, George. Thanks.

Toywatch 2007! Um, you guys are just now telling me that Aqua Dots contain (well, break down into) GHB? Dude.

good news, bad news The good news is that I have my new new official theme song. "Because I'm Awesome" by The Dollyrots. That's my new motherfucking theme song: You're stronger, faster and can spell. Yes, thanks, but I would use a serial comma after that penultimate item. And that sentence isn't parallel. But whatever. It's rock.

Anyhow, I especially like the little bratty spoken part at the end, which sounds exactly like me when I'm unmedicated. And hey guess what? Not medicated. And guess what? Not enjoying this. I called the doctor and discovered--here's more good news--that I had an appointment today. I thought it was last week and I missed it. Then I realized that I had no fucking idea what day it was today.

I seriously had the following exchange at the office:

OTHER GUY: Hey, were you here on Friday?

ME: I have no idea.

The weekend was like trying to stand up in a squall, topped off by the unexpected arrival of a totally random four-year-old who came over and stayed for six hours on Saturday. He was with his dad, who was doing some work for my neighbor, next door. And I guess he needed some kind of supervision and it takes a village and all that, but sometimes the kids in the village need to stay out of the hut of the Crazy Lady until she gets her Depakote.

Incredibly, I found in the doctor's waiting room a woman who was more fucked up than I was. She was having some difficulty affording her mental health care, and it was a really bad scene. The receptionist had her on the phone with some kind of agency. The doctor wanted her to come back in three weeks (anything above monthly is a big deal in our practice), but she couldn't afford to. That's how people slip through and get lost.

I stopped her as she was leaving. I told her I didn't want to get up in her business, but I gave her a $20 because that's what I had. Use it for whatever. She took it and looked at it like she was going to have to figure out what it was. Then she gave it back.

I go back in two weeks.